Sharing Your Faith Without the Cringe
10 Humble Habits for Spiritual Conversations
Talking about faith can feel risky in today’s world. We worry about offending others, saying the wrong thing, or sounding pushy. But spiritual conversations don’t have to be awkward or aggressive. Here are ten practices for engaging others with humility, compassion, and clarity—whether you’re sharing your faith or simply talking about God in everyday life.
1. Be a questioner
One of the best ways to engage someone is to be authentically curious about what they believe. Ask questions that help them clarify their own thinking, like “What do you mean by that?” or “How do you know that?” Even Jesus asked questions to help people reflect on their beliefs and motives (Luke 18:19).
2. Listen to understand
Respect begins with listening. When someone feels heard, they’re more likely to engage with your ideas in return. Tim Muehlhoff reminds us that most of us overestimate our listening skills. Proverbs 18:13 is a good reminder: "To answer before listening—that is folly and shame."
3. Take care of your own house
It’s easy to fall into “performative evangelism”—talking about hope, joy, or love we aren’t cultivating ourselves. Before we talk about the fruit of the Spirit, we need to be nurturing those roots in our own lives. Evangelism isn’t a script; it’s an overflow of formation. A life shaped by grace and truth gives your words weight.
4. Care in a meaningful way
Scripture calls us to care for the poor, the marginalized, and the vulnerable (1 John 3:16–18, James 1:27). If we ignore people’s suffering, our message may sound like noise (1 Corinthians 13:1). Empathy and reason, together, make for powerful witness.
5. Show genuine interest in others
We live in a culture of expressive individualism, where people are often treated as props for our own identity formation.1 Instead, we’re called to value others above ourselves (Philippians 2:3–4). Humility starts with seeing others as whole people, not just conversation partners.
6. Appreciate differing viewpoints
Our worldviews are shaped by upbringing, culture, denomination, education, and more. No one person holds all the truth—only God does (Psalm 147:5). When we remain open to being challenged, we invite more honest and fruitful dialogue.
7. Make love your goal
The heart of evangelism is love—for God and for neighbor (Matthew 22:37–38). When we approach someone with love, not an agenda, the conversation changes (Luke 6:31). Love reminds us that the person in front of us is never a project, but someone made in the image of God—someone to be delighted in, not just reached.
8. Don’t get defensive
When someone challenges our faith, it’s easy to shift into self-protection. But defensiveness shuts down our ability to minister well. Instead of reacting, anchor yourself in the example of Christ—who responded to hostility with questions, stories, and moments of silence (Luke 20:1–40; John 8:6). Stay calm, listen closely, and look for common ground.
9. Don’t try to seal the deal
In many church circles, this means leading someone to accept salvation in one conversation. But that pressure can be misplaced. God is the one who saves (John 16:8). Share truth with love, and let the conversation unfold without force.
10. Don’t play the numbers game
Every person matters. We’re not called to track conversions like metrics. Remember the lost sheep (Matthew 18). Let go of results-driven pressure, and focus on faithful presence.
Want more on faith and conversation?
…for future posts on navigating spiritual conversations, cultural tension, and how to talk about what matters most—without losing your voice or your mind.
Read more on this topic in Joshua Chatraw and Mark D. Allen. Apologetics at the Cross. Zondervan Academic.
Wonderful advice! Thank you, Mary Jo.
Great advice. Thank you!